How do I talk about money with my partner?

Talking about money with your partner is incredibly important. This is because money and values are intrinsically linked. Moreover, with money as the #1 stress in relationships, talking about money with your partner can help alleviate some of the stress and bring you both on the same page. But – having the conversation can feel overwhelming… Here are some steps to undertake.

A. Set the scene

  • Ask your spouse for one night where you talk about your values & life goals. Money is the tool to help you get there!
  • If your partner is reticent to comply, blame us! We say it is an absolutely critical step for any serious couple

1. Start by understanding each others money values

  • Before laying out the bank account details, it is important to understand your partner’s behaviours, attitudes & beliefs when it comes to money. [LINK TO CONVERSATION GUIDE]
  • This will be incredibly enlightening and something every couple, we believe, should do before they get married

2. Determine your combined net position

  • If you are in a committed relationship, it may make sense to combine accounts
  • Therefore understanding your net position – what is left after you take away all your spending from your earnings. This step takes time but has significant impact on both parties [LINK TO MONEY POSITION]
  • Consider each expense as a couple and ask “Is this in line with our values? Does it make me/us happy?”

3. Take action together

  • Use both names on bills, loans; share costs and plan for a shared future with shared goals

MoneySmart provides additional information here –